A Dead Man's Book of Journey Part VIII : Enemies of Light

Winter comes, and our hearts are shivering

A story of love, the flower of live is withering

There in the depth of nothingness where a drop of water will never survive the cold

It’s crystallized into dead-cold thorns of Ice

As if it feels this freezing drop of blood out of my wounded heart

Enough of this path

I can’t stand the pressure

Every moment burns these muscles

That it leaves fresh-red trail on my steps

Enough of this senseless devotion

It dives through my vein like a venom

Whispering words of despair in each second ticks

Brings me closer to a moment of dying I can never imagine

So why was I so kind to the world

If it pays me back with plague I’d owe him to death?

Why was I so sincere, never run out of affection in my hands?

Why did I let myself down for an unworthy feeling?

Why did I let these eyes blinded by a blurry light of a candle of hope

Lightyears away?

There was no yesterday

Not even tomorrow exists for a broken heart

All that were here will turn to dust

All that were something will turn into nothing

And finally that prayer I did the last day of Fall answered

Angels in black, covered in their wings of dark

Has finally came all the way down to the lowest ground

Delivering just a word from the high Lord

“Arise”, now that I think it’s already too late to get back

Out of the heat of hellfire judgement I was chosen

To lead his army into the last war in heaven

He lend me strength, give me understanding

Bless me his wicked thoughts

Weaponize me with guilt

That now I’m just a mere name of the holy book’s favorite

Enemies of Light, Descendant of the damned

General of my own majesty

On the ministry of Nine Pillars of Hell

I will ride these starving dragons

Marching toward the throne of god

Whiter than white, darker than black

When I’m no longer a man but a long dead warrior of bleeding hatred

I will play the cadence of ultimate redemption

That will flood the moon with tears of sorrow

And the rain would be a crimson blessing fallen on earth

Here comes the me, oh my dear winter nights

I’m scared of your cold no more

I can never go back and live the life I’ve left

Now I’m a part of the battle

I vowed my destiny would belong to the King of Deathless Soul

Reigning under his shadow throne for another age of ascension

We don’t lose for too long, we’re the ones who will not die

That’s why I can never wait to pay you back a kiss I owe you

A moment I always want you to fall into

A few seconds of regret where you can never run away from

So breathe with me, I won’t try to own you though

Let’s just look back at all you’ve done to me

I’ll amend you, yet it’s going to hurt you a bit..



(Inspired by : Dream Theater - Lost Not Forgotten)

A Dead Man's Book of Journey Part VII : We Set Sail Off of This Sunken Ship

We walk this life like writing a long long story
each day is another beginning
we'd scratch the book of our story with some memories
those we'd tell our children as an epic tale
some are heroic, yet mostly are simply pathetic

We chase our dream like an artist
Each time The sun rises, we'd have done another strokes
On a canvas that was white
with another red, another blue
we'd fill the plain us with hope, expectation, some wishes

Then we'd spread the wings of Icarus
to set us free from this cage of the cruel world
out to the furthest, everlasting liberation
we flew upon the saddest mourns of our time
we rose up to some altitude we did never imagine
we felt the high skies air so soothing
we float among the brightest cloud under the sun
such a place we thought never exists, towns of the skies

we were in chase
of the celestial beauty
said to be dwelling somewhere on earth
it was just one and the only
which would pierce through any heart
makes all kings of devil kneels before it
and all angels shall surrender upon its presence
and the leaves of heaven's pillar shall fall
down to the lowest ground

life was beautiful, love was beautiful
some old songs was beautiful
few words from your deepest thought were beautiful
one to seven, each half step was beautiful
and the kiss of a desperate virgin in a summer night,
it was all just beautiful

yet sure god is too picky
to give birth to this sense like a revelation
ain't the same for every beating heart
ain't well spread like a falling rain
when my eyes finally able to see
and my ears able to listen
my heart is able to feel
that the beauty we're looking for ain't so far
it's in us, in every color of our skins
in every beat of our hearts
in every thought of our minds
yet you just left our stance

was told we're in search of the ultimate wonder
I found one in the colors on the skies
auroras, starlights and rainbows
I found one in the sounds of the music
the harmony, the symphony, the rhapsody
I found one between people's heart
affection, devotion, admiration
just why can't you see?

was just told that what should be our next stop
is uncertainity
just why can't you feel we're already here?
We've been through the darkest path
been menacing the Immortals
been tried to play one though
been grasping the forsaken artifact
one that was believed to be gone forever
found all we've dreamed about
still you staring at me telling that these are all lies?

Our ship is sinking yet we try to stand on board
I regret all of the things we argue
we should never have one
you just don't want to believe

so I play this, one last song for you
as we both would be damned by the king of seas, soon enough
this is the end, yet you are still my friend
we will be holding hands forever
on the other side, we will set sail off of the same ship
and chase the same dream again

Dead Man's Book of Journey part VI : I See My Bride in You

A moment in a silent night

I walked the path human pray their children not to fall into

Hands covered with blood

With some stranger's scent on my trail

I snatched thousands of life barehanded

I offered the best drops to the goddess

I keep the demon's pride upon this barren earth

What else to tell, all keys to the gates of hell

Just for now, it's different

I have got no heart

But why did my chest feel the beat?

That was the second I look into her eyes

My flesh and bones has refined by hellfire

But why did I feel the pain?

That was the moment I touched her

I have wiped all signs of emotion away of me

Why still I spare her life?

She's just some stranger

And I let her go

She's just a mere bitch

Yet I feel sorry before I even unleash her scream

Out to the real world

We all swim within the ocean of possibilities

I have nothing but an answer

For questions the night have brought to me

It must be her

The one and the only

My dear first and my dear last

Has finally hear my whispers

Out of the ashes she reborns

Out of the blood I spilled she awakens

Out of the souls I ripped she comes alive

My dear bride, queen of all damned

I finally feel your presence is in thirst

I see what those wicked eyes are longing for

A fountain of virgin's tears

I hear what those sweet lips whisper back at me

Let us unite one more time, my love

Raise your hands by the sundown

I will take you to sail through the night

I will hold your hands and dance with you

We'd spread our yearning madness throughout the world

We'd call forth the dead stars to shower our dark skies

We'd spill more blood than which ever written in the book of wars

We'd mow these tasty fools clean

We'd harvest their lust and dye the earth red over black

So that I will have you in my arms again

Just hold me tight, I'm setting you free with her wasted youth

(chuckles...)

(inspired by : Forsaken - Dream Theater)

Dead Man's Book of Journey part V : How Deep is The Darkness?

I have come this far

To the depth of my sorrow

This is where no tears left to cry

No more pain to endure

I gave up my very heart to the ruler of the other side

She said she’d give me more than I always wanted

Be it power, be it knowledge, be it truth

“How low can you go?” she asked

“How high can you take me?” I asked her back

It is not a game of god

It is a long walk across the skies

You will never know how far you can go

Because no one walks the same path

And no one arrives at the same end

And I dare myself for the challenge

I would walk on the flame

I would swim in the sands

I would drink your poison

Just for a sense of understanding

That I just wanted to see through

What lies beneath their hearts

What hides within their eyes

Intentions masked by their smiles

All that causes them pretending

Like they’re one worth a trust

So this is where it all begins

A point of no return

Where angels paint their wings black

And pathetic humans strive for ascension

Just the way I am

Diving into an endless wave of hatred

I see the colors of pain

Some blurry mist of hopelessness

All weaving this world of agony

And we feed ourselves with everything inside

There is no need to worry

One would rise above the others

One would be destined to conquer this all

One would understand the depth of darkness

One would challenge the holy throne

We’re just here to give a try

Until we find a reason to give up

Or the honor to step higher..

It is... awakening of the damned

Dead Man's Book of Journey part IV : Moments of Togetherness

It was when summer comes into my age

Beatiful, like butterfly wings

As the sun lights up my best days

and the sweden northern lights of my best nights

Because of you on my very side

Yeah, it was wonderful back then

I saw you smiling at me each time I open my eyes

I heard you chuckle when I pretended to be fallen asleep

We laughed the same laughter

We strove to the same goals

We shared the damn tears

And all the time we held each other’s hands

In good times, in struggling days

You would take me to the beach where I can see the sun sets

We were laying our backs on the sand

Staring at the sky which was always blue

Clouds, starfish, shells

anything we found we would be happy to talk about

we were running into the meadows

only to meet the deer mowed the grassland

we would look for the bad wolf, hiding owls

playing hide and seek under the trees

just like no lovers else

our feeling was chapters of adventure

new day, new play

across the meadows and the forest

there was a land covered with snow

wonderfully white, everlasting cold

there we lit the fire

You were sitting close to me

Put your head on my shoulder

Heart to heart

There goes the talk

As the snow falls, we’d wander around the universe

And I’d share all the heat left in me

For you to survive the night

So that tomorrow you’d wake up smiling

Asking me what kinda dream I’ve had

Whether it was about you or about us

We’d lit the fire again and have another wonderful day

Before the wind took you

Before the stars bury all that’s left from our togetherness

I just feel good

Too good to live the same life again

Too good to walk the same path again

Too good to be fallen into such love again

Too good to be there, waiting for you again

I have had enough, with nothing left in my hands

I believe, what is there for me now is just a moment

Where I’d be wither and say goodbye

I just want to thank the book of life

For all the joy written for me

For all that I can never forget

Until my role on the play ends

I’d say I enjoyed it all

Now the ship has come to take me

To the land far, faraway

Endless darkness awaits

Everlasting curse is longing for me

I’m ready to sail to the other side

(Inspired by : a girl I never want to mention the name^^)

Dead Man's Book of Journey part III : The Winter Solstice

A tale from ages behind
Prophecy carved on walls of flame
Elders of the land faraway
Passed onto children of today

It is a beginning of an end
Then all hierarchy shall be ruined
A single day of fate
Some would love, some would hate

Left and right
Will each wing stop arguing?
Will they hold each others hand
And start preparing?
The final ceremony eventually set the stage
And tiphareth, the mother of light calls forth an end
to the fragile age of life

We shall live in flame
Crucified in a maddening spin of fire
North shall be fallen into the South
Drowned and burned
all weaklings shall have before they say goodbye
It’s not six days of creation
It’s a single day of destruction

So what’s the point of relying
On what is never meant to be true?
Can we just grow some worry?
Won’t it be that we’ll feel sorry?
See, when we’re divided into two or three
Isn’t that we’re died already?
For arguing, for blaming
Pointing at each other and judge
Playing god with feet stepping on the land
Which we did never created

None have just think about this
Behind all the table you’re still too small
The spin itself is something you’d never understand
Until the day we’re shown the real end
Where mysteries uncovered along the morbid screams
Then the angels of death shall be very busy
Taking care of you, stupid mankind

Well, as for me I love to talk about the devil
Where is he when you are asleep?
Still he wanders by the time you awake?
He might be laughing now
Upon you fool’s debate
Because you never solve anything after

“Winter Solstice, the fall of the skeptics”
He is just into what they think is true
Who knows it when the sun would sail from the hell back to heaven?
Who would realize that the flame for your ashes
Has been set long since the devil born?

We’re thrashed and scattered
More, we are slaughtered and raped
By illusion and dreams
Making us dumb, blind, and deaf
Which lead us to the destruction from inside
That the destined moment will take place here in our souls
So that no one will know..

Dead Man's Book of Journey part II : Story of a Heartless

Just a while ago
thought I looked at the mirror, I saw a gentle man staring at me..

his eyes filled up with hope
he smiled at me like it's been so long for him
longing to see his beloved one

I felt warmth
I felt innocence
I felt a sincere heart
I felt a kindness, few of those which really exists at such age

but sure the clock ticks way too fast..

the next time I looked into the mirror, I thought my heart would jump out of my chest..

I saw the devil
not a man nor even a woman
a figure in black
with a scar run across the face
and the tip of its long red tongue lightly bitten between the teeth
smiled, no.. it was a grin

the eyes filled with hatred, burning inside a murderous intent..
says nothing but its will
to put a sad end
for the rest of the world

what was that?
where had the man gone?
where was the sincerity and all good things in him?

so then I was looking again at the mirror
might an answer be written there

but all that I could see
was just nothing
yeah, I saw nothing
a depth of nothingness
no one has ever reached

what was that again?
where had everything gone?

I couldn't find the answer in the mirror
I couldn't find one in the wind
then I asked the time, as he keeps truth sealed in his journey..

though the price wasn't so cheap, the time finally answered me..
I was told a story from hundreds of year behind us

there was this man, known of his possession of kindness, caring, and loving heart..

life was like a summer
where flowers blooming
and the skies were blue
and the rainbow was seven in color
and the wind of the night whispers love into everyone's heart

then there was this rose, a wild red, one of the most beautiful of all..
spreading the heavenly scent at the best time of its life..

the man was so into the flower
he gave up his everything
to keep the wild in red
so he can always have the scent
one that he thought everlasting

until he discovered
the wild red has its thorn
those which would always leave wounds
in anyone when they are too much close

and the man did hurt
by the beauty and the lies
by the wild red and the thorn

then time painted the skies dark
time drawn the rainbow black
as the man thrown up his heart
all kindness and affection
flown in the wind of the cold winter nights

the man felt alive no more
without his heart, he sat on the throne of the other side
as he transcended into one the god hates the most
the devil, a heartless divine
with his color, black
he'd feed the gloomy nights
with dark thoughts
wicked intentions
he'd fill into any lonely heart
hatred, lust, selfishness..

he'd keep away all living thoughts from love
he'd save his fellows from the wild red
so that none would be harmed by its thorn
he'd invite every harmed one
to throw away their hearts, their emotions
just like he did

so that one day, earth would be covered in black, like the color he prefers to paint
that the only thing which exist
would be nothing
nothing
nothing
a depth of nothingness

just like what I see in the mirror just now..

Dead Man's Book of Journey part I : Losing

CHAPTER I : A MERE BEGINNING

candle light in a silent night
pouring tears from wistful eyes

as my sweat turns red
I think of none but it's death
coming over me

my lord, the hands of creation and destruction
here I am.. whispering at an end
for the wind to listen, even if it would care not...

that there's just nothing left to keep you satisfied..

I'm blessed with life..
yet I tried to end it with a knife..
I walk your chances away..
I wasted your gifts, time, youth, love, joy..
all shattered before the moonlight

I lived as a shadow, crawling away from light..
clouding my mind with anger, hatred, greed, lust..
sins which pay the devil a mad feast..
got devoured by wicked thoughts, weaving a dream of unholy intentions..
then consumed, confined in the deepest abyss of the land he promised would set us free from you..

well, there was a time I tried to be a hero..
thought I'd save a lot..
only to find out that I'd end up becoming a scapegoat..
I make them happy, trading their tears with my joy..
so I cried a thousand years long to make them smile a mere second..

that's how friendship, trust, love has betrayed me..
and it's true that I was too weak to fight back..
that I gave up my heart to the one you dump..

I've fought the whole story my own..
still I feel the pride is just never enough..
though maybe I need some hands to hold..
yet I think to end this all so none would ever hurt..

I'd just let you decide..
whether this gonna be the real end or just another test..
to realize that you've been fair to me..
why not lending me a hand this time??
so I'd pass through like you always expected..

the scythe skipped me, I suppose..
then another dawn is coming..

the fight shall begin again
yet the end is always bitter for the likes of me
no matter how much've I tried..
because that's what you promised..
to me, to us, to the rest of the world..